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Asked 12/13/2011

Fear of Success?

I have a small spa that I opened a few months ago. I haven't worked much and tend to shy away- I don't know why! I want to be successful, but I am almost scared that it will work out! I have never fathomed being scared that something would turn out well! Anyone have advice? I have an anxiety disorder that is hard to keep controlled, but I really need to overcome this fear and live the life I want.

 
 
 
 
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Answer 1/4 - Submitted 12/13/2011

If you see yourself overcoming it, then continue the path you have already chosen.

Fear of the unknown, fear of something you have never experience is natural. Remember to take it one step at a time. If you know you have got something good than go with it. But remember the higher the calling, the greater the opposition. It won't be without its trials and travails.

Keep your eyes on the prize. Study hard and make sure you have things in order before the grand opening. It's great to anticipate something wonderful in life that is to come. It's awesome to be able to know that you are at the right place, at the right time and doing the right thing that brings a blessing to you and others. Good luck!

 
 

Answer 2/4 - Submitted 12/14/2011

You might want to try meditation and visualization. Sometimes people sabotage themselves. I have done it before. Meditation reduces stress and things that bothered you before will not bother you as much. Visualization can be used to prepare for success. You should also try some affirmations. Using visualization and affirmations you can program yourself to think and act differently. See yourself having a successful business and associate it with being happy.

 
 

Answer 3/4 - Submitted 12/14/2011

It sounds as if your anxiety is looking for excuses to kick in. Some people fear success because they feel they do not deserve it, although they desire it. Others associate it with a past event that made them feel similar feelings.

It may be worthwhile to take this issue to a counselor. According to an article published earlier this year in Psychology Today called "Fear of Success," some people link the excitement of success with feelings of a past trauma or verbal abuse.

The article points out that body responses to excitement and trauma can be very similar. People who have been traumatized often want to reject the feelings that remind them of the trauma. The urge to suppress the feelings can be so strong that a person tries not to feel them even in a positive situation.

Even when no negative psychological history is involved, some people have negative associations with success like a fear of competing or fear that the success will lead to eventual disappointment. That makes it difficult to accept success as a good thing.

A counselor may help you discover what is at the heart of your fear.

 
 

Answer 4/4 - Submitted 12/14/2011

You might be worried about all the responsibilities that happen if you get really successful. But that is a bit silly because you will be ready to take these on when they happen - understandably, you don't feel ready now because you have just started. Your situation is a bit like a medical student worrying about taking on the responsibilities of a senior surgeon leading a team. Sure, those responsibilities can seem scary - but there is plenty of time and plenty of experience in between, and plenty of steps for the medical student to go through, in between medical school and leading a team of surgoens!

Likewise, you might be worried about the possibility of expanding your business one day. But odds are that even the most succcessful spa will not become an immediate, overnight sensation requiring you to expand to new premises a week from now, so you will have time in between starting, building up business, gaining experience, etc until it's time to expand (or whatever other responsibility it is that scares you). Really, don't sweat it. And congratulations on starting a business! Just remind yourself that as you progress, you will gain experience - this experience in turn will make you ready for new responsibilities whenever they do arrive.

 
 
 
 
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